So, I had all four wisdom teeth out on Monday, and while I’ve avoided the Vidocin after the fact, there were a few fun moments while the anesthesia wore off. Other than the first one, I vaguely remember all of these. From what I recall, I intended all of them to be jokes, but honestly, who knows.
1) When asked if I wanted to keep the teeth, I sad yes because “I wanted to make earrings and a necklace for Erin (my fiance).”
2) For whatever reason, I’m fascinated by knifes, so it was natural that I inquire about them. Apparently the MN State Fair was on my mind when I asked if they got their knives from the 80 year old man who makes outdated and inappropriate comments while selling the latest cutlery in the Merchandise Mart.
3) While lightly flicking my right earlobe, I asked if they gave me monkey ears while I was under.
4) When talking about possible reasons I would need to come back in, I said “Can you give me gills if I have to come back in, because ‘I’m not that strong a swimmer’.” I am particularly impressed by this one seeing as I was referencing the above semi obscure SNL bit and still tried doing his “accent.”
George Carlin - The American Dream
So much truth.
I am an Anti-Dentite.
More reasons why baseball is so great :)
Teddy Roosevelt gets leveled by a Pierogi. Almost as good as the Sausage getting clubbed by Randall Simon. Lets hope the Twins have something in store for us next year.
I think about this every time I chop broccoli, and I chop a lot of broccoli.
I’m right there with you.
This is straight up ridiculous… and I love it!
Hannibal Buress - my new favorite comedian.
I can’t even handle this.
Brilliant!
Buzz Aldrin punches Bart Sibrel after he claims Buzz never went to the moon.
Fuck yeah, Buzz Aldrin. Let’s watch this over and over again. (via gesteves)
What a way to celebrate the 40th Anniversary of Apollo 11.
You know how most images of police in riot gear strike an impersonal, anonymously intimidating Storm Trooper look? Not so for the Honduran military.
They only select the best men after years of rigorous training.
Ahahahaha.
